February 2012
Anonymous asked: why do people always ask you if you're gay? i know it's like the internet but it's not as if you post loads of lady gaga or homo pix
if my mom's still asleep: Shh don't make noise she's asleep
if my dad's still asleep: Shh don't make noise he's asleep
if my brother's still asleep: Shh don't make noise he's asleep
if I'm still asleep: I need to vacuum for 3 hours and use the blender
Anonymous asked: are you gay?
unhomogenized milk: no homo
marilyn monroe: stop using me as an excuse for being fat
me: I'm gonna study when I get home
me: I'll just study before I go to bed
me: I'll just study in the morning
me: I'll just study on the way to school
me: I'll just study in this class
me: I'll just study in the hall
me: I'll just study before the test
me: I'll just study during the test
1 tag
k1mkardashian:
cocain-chanel:
never gets old omg
3kl;dfasdlfk
france: ten
france: twenty
france: thirty
france: forty
france: fifty
france: sixty
france:
france:
france: sixty ten
world: france what are you do—
france: four twenties
world: france stop it
france: four twenties ten
world: france that doesn't even make any sense
france:
france:
france:
world:
france:
world:
france: hundred.
nuggits2:
what if instead of gay song quotes as captions on fb profile pictures, people used historical facts
The shortest war on record was fought between Zanzibar and England in 1896. </3
The flushing toilet was invented in 1596 <3
The condom - made originally of linen - was invented in the early 1500’s ;]
Every person has a unique tongue print <333
Every time Beethoven sat down...
January 2012
teacher: what unit of measurement-
me: in daylights
teacher: thats not-
me: in sunsets
me: in midnights
teacher: you cant-
me: in cups of coffee
teacher: thats impossi-
me: in inches
teacher: yes! thats what i-
me: in miles
teacher: but you just-
me: in laughter
me: in strife
teacher: *opens mouth*-
me: in five hundred-twenty five thousand-six hundred minutes
teacher: well in this case you dont measure in ti-
me: how about looooooooooooooooove
teacher: i give up
me: measure in looooooooooove
teacher: out
me: seasons of loooooooooooooooove (attempt to harmonize with myself)
1 tag
Anonymous asked: wow ur cute
1 tag
blackmormon:
if u dont have nice eyebrows then ur not attractive
renxya:
unfunnywhitegirl:
here is a list of words you can use without offending someone on the internet:
•
•
•
my brother was murdered by three black dots.
2 tags
Letters from Kids to God
annefranksgasmask:
any milk that isnt chocolate milk is gross
case closed bring in the dancing lobsters
jmimy:
thenotorioussmall:
okay i know what sexual frustration is
but what do you call it when you wanna cuddle the shit outa someone?
im going with cuddle frustration
im so cuddly frustrated right now
its called homosexuality and it’s actually a disease
1 tag
ducke-fup asked: A - Z lolololololol
teamtwerkin:
oh my gOD WHAT